yes, we're still alive!

Tod leading everyone in an abridged Passover meal.

Alphonzo, Corey, and Dinsdale displayed their manly Mighty Men-ness by jumping in the lake! Dinsdale said he wasn't even cold...

Samadge reading his Bible out loud...

Aunt Trisha teaching! I love the way God uses her!

Well, it's been awhile. I, for one, stop reading other people's blogs when they go for weeks with no entries! So I may be writing this for myself and no one else! :) I figured out the other day that we have travelled out of town five times since Thanksgiving and I'm rather tired of packing/unpacking for all eight of us! We had the Mighty Men Bible retreat out at the lake house a couple of weeks ago - it was a bit draining. It's good that I'm writing about it now because my words probably would've been very me and NOT Jesus when I returned home a week ago Monday! We have one kid who is on meds for various issues and he "forgot" his medicine. We had to isolate him from the other boys most of the weekend and all the adults were about ready to go throw his sweet little disrespectful, lying, disobedient hiney in the lake by the second day (all except Aunt Trisha who had received an amazing amount of grace to love him patiently all weekend!)! This was stressful. On the trip home in the Mighty Man Van, this boy's brother punched another MM in the face three times because he spit on him. My husband literally put the wheel of the car in the hands of our Op Camp director, turned around, and yelled at them for I don't know how long. We agreed later that perhaps this was not done perfectly in the spirit of Christ...ha! But to top it all off, the boys' mama was waiting for us when we got home to not-so-tactfully tell us that all the problems that had occurred were our fault. She actually accused my husband of not loving her boys, etc. and said they would never be back. (they were back yesterday). The truth is, once we got over being amazingly angry and frustrated, we really were filled with a lot of love for this family (who is extremely wounded) and we have been praying more than ever for salvation, deliverance, etc. God is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger, and abounding in love. Really. We are no better off than they are, except that merciful Father has led us to the foot of His throne a little sooner. It's going to be a cool day when they are there with us! There's nothing like a hard-to-love person to really bring you to your knees and remind you that you are absolutely pitiful without Jesus! More on that in a minute...The COOL thing about the retreat was that God did incredible things! Randy's oldest brother, Tod, came out on Saturday and led the boys in a little campfire "chat" that night. For the first time in two years, they shared with each other what was going on in their hearts. There were LOTS of tears and lots of joy. They finally are beginning to feel "safe"with each other. And Aunt Trisha did a phenomenal job of walking them through the Bible over the weekend. I think most of them could at least give you a better summary of God's story than they could before they came! :)

The weekend after the retreat, we made our way to Waco for our seventh year of World Mandate at Antioch Community Church. McKenna and Josiah, Byron and Corey (MM) went with us, so we had a bit of a break from taking care of our younger kids. There are no words to describe what this conference does for our thirsty and weary souls every year. Before I went I kept getting this picture of a thick layer of soil that was hard as a rock. Underneath the soil were all these emotions (mostly tears and crying out to God) that I couldn't seem to reach. Friday night worship/teaching were good, but I still knew that I hadn't deeply connected with Jesus and I had to come to the place where I said, "Okay, I can't get there in my flesh. If You want me to 'get anywhere' this weekend, You have to do it." Saturday, I saw what the hard soil was when the speaker was sharing his testimony that p.m. - it was clearly pride. That p.m. God told Randy that he was a "nobody." It was so FREEING!! This is yucky, true confessions here on the old blog, but the truth is that we have started thinking that maybe we're kind of cool and that we have some great ideas, etc. here in the hood. We hear all the time about how wonderful we are because of "what we're doing". WHATEVER!! When you're in an environment like World Mandate hearing story after story from people who are REALLY going for Jesus, it's a bit humbling! For example, there were these two ladies who are from Iran. They are older and have been going all over the place for many years sharing the gospel in "impossible" places. One time they heard of a Muslim village that was completely closed and anyone trying to enter to share the gospel would be killed. So they knew that they must go there. They went with their pastor and as they approached the village in their car, they were met by 10 guys all armed with machine guns. The pastor got out and told them that he needed to enter the village. They said "no" and he said that he must go in and give them a message. The guards asked what his message was, so he happily told them. As Mali and Vaji (the 2 ladies) watched from the car, all 10 men put down their machine guns and raised their hands to heaven, worshipping!! They got to enter and the entire village crammed in to a building to hear the gospel of Jesus! In another session this weekend, someone asked them about America. One of the women said that she was praying one day for America and God said that revival was coming. She told God that she didn't believe Him. His response? "It doesn't matter whether you believe Me or not, it's still going to happen." She repented and fasted for 40 days. No, I'm not kidding. I have not been in the presence of many who are so obviously filled with the joy of Christ and who walk in a humility that I've never even touched! Randy looked at me with tears in his eyes during one of their stories and said to me, "Who do you think is richer - her or me?" They have almost nothing materially. I dream of touching the heart of God in the way that I've witnessed in these women. There is a huge cost to that kind of intimacy. We are longing for it more than ever and realizing that it starts with a lot of prayer. God has been showing us how much we've been attempting in our own strength and power. It hasn't, and never will, go very far. God reminded us that we really are NOTHING and as long as we remember that, He can do mighty things! ALL that to say, that Saturday night worship was indescribable! It's been a long time since I felt that joyful and free in worship. Something broke (pride). I couldn't stop smiling and looking at Him. And as I looked around a colliseum with around 3000 people dancing and singing their hearts out at the end of the night (including my children and Byron and Corey), I knew that we had tasted heaven for just a few seconds. THAT was reality - we just don't live in it very often.

I could write forever about all that God spoke to our hearts over the weekend, but I won't. What else has been going on? Moriah turned FIVE! We have had amazing breakthough with her and have been enjoying great peace in our family over the past month. This is a direct answer to prayer! Thanks to all of you who have lifted her and us up to the one who restores! Malachi is almost walking and will turn ONE next week! Wow! Time flies.... Our friends, the Connallys will be here in about four more months! And the guys are getting ready for the Uganda trip in June. There are a LOT of other things going on , but I'm going to wrap up this eternal post. Summary? A sweet season of realizing that NOTHING is impossible with God and very little IS possible without Him. I LOVE the riches of His grace!