Friday, January 22, 2010

Why I'm not good at loving the poor

What is it about loving the poor that is so hard? It’s me. I’m the problem. Yes, the poor are difficult to love at times, but most people enjoy helping others. When the earthquake struck in Haiti, just like with many other recent disasters, there was an outpouring of support. Do you wonder why? I think it’s because people want to help. So why, you ask, are people so reluctant to help in situations that are not so acute? Why does the monotonous march of serious, life-destroying poverty continue largely unnoticed by most? Here are a few reasons:

  1. Commitment is hard. I can make a one-time decision to help someone, but when I am faced with the reality of a long-term need, I find that my resolve weakens. If I can’t fix the problem in less than a month, I will probably get distracted and move on to something else.
  2. Trust is even harder. Lack of trust may be the biggest obstacle to overcoming poverty. Many of the poor are dishonest. Even if the people I want to help are honest, chances are that there is a dishonest person in the situation. Here is an example. I wanted to help a boy with musical talent, so I gave him a fairly expensive set of electronic drums for Christmas one year. The next time I went to his house the drums were gone. His mom had sold them to get something she wanted, or maybe even needed. Often the things we want to do to help people never really help the people we are reaching out to.
  3. Poverty is confusing. Problems can get really complex. Every time we come up with a solution to a problem we find another problem waiting. Often, even our solutions cause problems. It doesn’t take many failed attempts at problem solving to make one want to abandon their quest to make things right.
  4. People sin. Days, weeks, or even years of investing in someone may prove to have been fruitless as that person makes choices to live a destructive lifestyle. Addictions, habits, and even just plain sin cause people to turn on those who love them. It happens so often that we often find ourselves feeling hopeless about the poor and giving up on even trying.
  5. Materialism is sneaky. We see it in others, but our own selfishness is easy to justify. Coffee, books, meals, gadgets--they aren’t such a big deal--they just add up. Before long we find ourselves too poor to help others because we have piddled away our money.
  6. Time is sneaky, too. Every day fills itself whether we want it to or not. Rarely does loving the poor displace a few minutes on the computer or chatting on the phone unless we make difficult and deliberate choices.
The bottom line is that none of these reasons really matter. Jesus tells us to love the poor, so we should. Thankfully, he also promises that in spite of all the difficulties loving the poor is a wonderful investment. Whatever failures we encounter are temporary. The guarantee is that we will become more like Jesus, that we will have incredible joy, and that real tangible treasure will come to us in this life and in the life to come.

Monday, January 18, 2010

Happy Anniversary!

I took this pic on Dec 30th, our 16th anniversary. We went out to dinner that p.m. with McKenna babysitting all 6 of our kids. Our plan was to come home, sneak into our bedroom and watch a movie there so I could feed the baby. McKenna had completely cleaned the kitchen and living room and decorated our room. She and Josiah provided room service for us the rest of the evening. All we had to do was call them from our cell phones! hee! None of the other kids knew we were there and it would have worked out so well, EXCEPT for the fact that Piper had her worst night EVER! She fussed all evening while we watched our movie and I didn't make it to bed until 2 a.m.! At midnight I had a crying baby and was administering ibuprofen to Isaac who had 103 degree fever (for some unknown reason). These were the things on my nightstand at one point and it was such a perfect representation of this season of life that we find ourselves in! Thank you God for EVERY season! LOL!
sparkling cider, our wedding glasses, motrin, thermometer, and a dirty diaper...

Aunt Dot

A couple of weeks ago, the Brown family and friends went to the Cowboy game (a game they actually WON), and Piper got to meet Great Aunt Dot! Sweet!

our Moriah

It's hard to tell in this pic, but she fell asleep in her big tub of stuffed animals one night! We thought it was pretty funny when we found her there.

pretty sure she's the happiest baby I've ever had - joy girl!

God has answered some very specific prayers that we prayed for this baby! We asked for no colic and she's not colicky. Also asked that she be joyful - she really is super happy and easy. She's also starting to sleep all night already - this is HUGE! She's having a little trouble actually getting to bed at night, but once I get her there, she's making it 6-8 hours. Such a blessing during this exhausting season! Thank you, Lord, for giving us so much mercy!

Saturday, January 16, 2010

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

"One feels less frustration with the tug and tension of family life when forsaking Hallmark-polished expectations and fully embracing the truth that love is the messiness of dying to self." A. Voskamp

Good quote for me to remember in these days of "running thru mud." LOL! I don't have the hands to type anything else right now and it's taken 2 days to write this much! sigh...