What if I believed?

So I've read One Thousand Gifts once and I continue to flip through it, rereading my highlights that are heavy throughout the book. This a.m I was listening to T.D. Jakes talk about how you will "go where you're thinking. So if you think you're going down, that's exactly where you'll go." So I turned to the last chapter of Ann's book, entitled "The Joy of Intimacy". When one of my friends got to this chapter, she texted me and said that it was beautiful and scandalous. It is. I still keep trying to go there and wrap my mind around the truth of God as lover. She begins the chapter with this sentence: "I fly to Paris and discover how to make love to God." (p 201). John 15:4 - "Remain in Me and I will remain in you." John 14:20 - "I am in my Father, and you are in Me, and I am in you." Ann V's comment follows "He's calling me to graft on, become one with the True Vine, the vine the biblical symbol of joy, festivity...fullness. He's calling me to come and celebrate being made one, and in Him, by Him, to bear the fruit of the full life round." (p 212) Yes. I want to be pregnant with all the fullness that is promised in the Word!

So as I pondered T.D. Jakes comments about our thinking this a.m., I remembered a quote that will forever be burned in my brain from Ann V on p 205: "the only thing to rip out the tape echoing of self-rejection is the song of His serenade. One thousand gifts tuned me to the beat. It really is like C.S. Lewis argued: that the most fundamental thing is not how we think of God but rather what God thinks of us: 'How God thinks of us is not only more important, but infinitely more important.'" At first, this sounds a bit theologically unsound, right? I mean, the world doesn't revolve around us, and our thoughts should be consumed with thoughts of Him (yes, true, on one level). But if I see God as omnipotent, powerful, creator, King, Father, loving, compassionate, but have an inaccurate view of how He sees me, I will never enter into the abundant life He has promised. Never. Not knowing and believing that I am who He says I am is crippling. For life. So this a.m. I began meditating on how He feels about me in my journal...

What if I really believed that...

-God passionately loves me right now?

-I really am a passionate, powerful, worshipper warrior princess in the kingdom of my Father, the King?

-I am beautiful, clothed with Christ, crowned with love and conmpassion, wearing beautiful bridal clothes, garments of praise and NOT heaviness?

-I never get what deserve (hell)?

-God's intentions toward me and all His plans for today are good?

-I really am a confident and capable woman because of the cross?

-God really can conquer any mountain that appears insurmountable?

-He is doting on me with all His affection, attention, and encouragement?

-the King is enthralled by my beauty (Ps 45:11)?

-the King of the entire universe, most creative of all creators, most encouraging, passionate, powerful, holy, perfect, compassionate, gracious, merciful, forgiving being EVER to exist feels all of those things and acts on all of those things toward me??!

I'd probably smile. All over. :)